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Published on April 30th, 2009 | by Darren Byrne


Who do I pray to to make this not real?

This is quite possibly the worst movie ever made with an A-list cast. It stars Matthew McConnaghey, Kate Beckinsale and Gary Oldman as a……well, just look at this:

Please someone tell me it’s a pisstake.

When the going gets rough, it’s only the size of your heart that counts.

Tip Toes was made in 2003. Has anyone seen it?

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About the Author

Blogger, writer, movie buff, amateur dramatist and all round nice guy. When I'm not spouting about on Culch.ie, I can be found Tweeting inanities @DarrenByrne or @Culch_ie. I am the admin behind Culch.ie and if you want to contact me for anything, drop me a mail.

8 Responses to Who do I pray to to make this not real?

  1. I do have a bit of a dwarf phobia, but that movie looks pretty good!!

  2. Darren Byrne says:

    @Jelly You’re kidding, right?

  3. Will Knott says:

    It has the trailer of a “movie of the week” about it. I’d believe it was real, but I doubt I’d be watching it.

  4. Bngr says:

    Darren – can’t see the link but if you were anyway experienced in light films you’d know that Matthew McConnaughty is the worst romantic lead in Hollywood history so even if the film looks good, stir clear. In fact the only film i’ve seen him in where he’s been anyway decent is Tropic Thunder. The film that saved him and Tom Cruise.

    Kate Beckinsale isn’t far off. She ruined what should have been a better ‘Emma’ and has been mildly annoying ever since – see Serendipity etc.

    Gary Oldman in fairness has cool stamped on his forehead, but he’s taken a downturn in the last decade and had confessed to only being in it for the cash now so I’m not surprised. He let me down when he complained that Sirius Black got killed in book 5 cause he wouldn’t be making as much cash from the HP films.

  5. Allan says:

    The implied blowjob at the start. The needle jumping noise to denote change of pace. Gary Oldman with a prosthetic head. The straight to DVDness of it all. It’s appalling. But the worst part is that rather than give the lead to an actual dwarf, they did the equivalent of blackening up Gary Oldman.

  6. NaRocRoc says:

    How do movies like that get made? Surely someone must’ve said “hang on a minute there now” at some point?

  7. Anthony McG says:


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